there is not so much as a reason to whine but i really need to get out this scrutiny is no longer within my normal width of tolerance. its existence is now but a parasite to my sanity. it negates what i consider as the muse of my intellect. its conceptual deprivation. its inhumane, its but a spectacle, and i think i've been fooling myself for the last couple of posts that i've whined and bled my heart in the words that i've written in previous posts. holiday spirits are low because its reality is still overshadowed by the demand of production required of my superiors. their charade of gift giving is even affecting my production and they cannot justify it to their even higher and mightier superiors. how long have i been playing this stupid game of airing out m greif and not do anything about it. maybe i just can't live up to what i've done for this job in the past, but there's a logical reason to not live up to such expectations since people change and change is imminent, now no wonder they're so shell shocked and its really just an issue of me no longer meeting that 'quota' that they required because the source of my workload no longer sends as much and they'd end up giving me another person's job. multi-tasking has been a pain in the high-knee really. whoever invented it ought to be crowned the king of slave drivers. to be fair with them i admit that i'm no longer really giving it my best, perhaps my reasons for doing so are not quite valid or would even be irrelevant. i've count the cost already. if it be justice that i'd be kicked out or sacked then fine. it it would mean that then again would mean that this would lead to me being more or less another unemployed slob at home maybe that then would be fair. i'm just so pissed off right now because i have yet to see any shred of evidence that everyone in here is considered by its system as nothing more than 'labor force,' 'manpower', an 'employee' a member of the 'staff', a 'worker' or nonetheless a 'human resource' a 'commodity' or an expendible 'asset' or better yet as i've said so in the past as cattle, (maybe we ought to start wearing bells on our necks now) and not so much as an individual human being that has a life other than work and a reason for working that is other than earning a buck and buying stuff with our salaries. is this what humanity has gone to? if it is then no wonder were slowly going down the drain. this is the last year that i'd be here next year its bye bye to this luminous flourescent dungeon.
on a lighter side, just last week i've finished setting up my deviantART page and if ever you'd be interested in visiting it simply scroll down and go to the sections directory of my sidebar and click on the link that says portfolio or simply click here