It is there that I looked at the electric sky and wished to kiss the rain

"So this is it. The painful realization that all has gone wrong..."
Dashboard Confessional

It was dark.
The room was damp and there was this spine-tingling chill that I am feeling inside my bones right now. My neck still aches from perching towards the phone.

I must be getting old.
I just realize that my mind has long been racing with all those unrealized dreams and longings that I've never seemed to keep up with from the time I turned 18. That rock star vision; that literati phase; the hopes of a revolution and the time spent in whining as to why things never seemed to make me feel assured of the person I am today.

If only life was a twisted emo song. Or a medieval fairytale where everything climaxes in an substantiated 'happily ever after...'

But it seems that those days were gone.

This must be how it feels in the zenith.

Terminus: it sucks!

I guess it wouldn't hurt to pop a razor and slash skin for the thrill of knowing that I might have died but I didn’t. Instead I’d wake up the following morning living with the regret that I have to live this crummy life as it was before.

Oh how I long for the time when in the act of writing, words and emotions come into place like lovers entwined by a perpetual adoration of thought and emotion.