Catch 22
Daily I see things that I shouldn't on normal occasions
I smell things that move my bowels
I wake up from a frantic sleep
I go out do my routine anticipating relief
Relief that is anathema
I find no solace in prayer for me to do so would mean to implore divine intervention for something unthinkable
I wallow in pain.
My life on an indefinite pause.
Bearing a cross that I can't unburden
I don't know what to believe anymore.
I smell things that move my bowels
I wake up from a frantic sleep
I go out do my routine anticipating relief
Relief that is anathema
I find no solace in prayer for me to do so would mean to implore divine intervention for something unthinkable
I wallow in pain.
My life on an indefinite pause.
Bearing a cross that I can't unburden
I don't know what to believe anymore.
kalbaryo
Habang inaalala natin ang mga kalbaryong bitbit ni Kristo, alalahanin din natin na bukod dito ay ang katotohanan na marami din na may bitbit na kalbaryong hindi pwedeng basta-basta na lang pwedeng bitiwan dahil ito ay isang tanikalang tinakdang bitbitin ng malupit at mapagbirong tadhana.
Miserable Pity Party
Despondent to the misery
Anticipating short-changed catharsis
Temper trapped between depression and crankiness
All I can say is goodnight
Anticipating short-changed catharsis
Temper trapped between depression and crankiness
All I can say is goodnight
all i want for xmas
all i want for xmas is...
... to wake up without an alarm clock
...to ride my bike again for leisure
... to read a book in silence
... to play my guitar again
...to be able to take a long, warm bath
... to be relieved of my perpetual headache
... to wake up without an alarm clock
...to ride my bike again for leisure
... to read a book in silence
... to play my guitar again
...to be able to take a long, warm bath
... to be relieved of my perpetual headache
Shit
A shitty life is:
When you wake up in the morning and in the middle of the night because someone has to shit
When you get called to drop everything to help someone shit
When you get called to clean after somone's shit
When you're eating but have to stop because someone needs help shitting
When you constantly hear farts, when you constantly smell farts
When you constantly see and clean after shit
When almost all you see and do has something to do with shit
When you realize that there's nothing you can do but deal with all the shit
Holy shit
anxiety
Time stands still
when circumstances
declare your indefinite
hiatus from life.
On constant adrenaline rush
motivated by functioning depression.
Wondering about faith
in an Almighty, Omnipotent
and the dissonance to that claim
and existential reality.
How can that be true?
I stare at the imminent
and protracted decay
of life.
Living among the sick,
oppressed, vulnerable and dying.
No silver linings in sight.
when circumstances
declare your indefinite
hiatus from life.
On constant adrenaline rush
motivated by functioning depression.
Wondering about faith
in an Almighty, Omnipotent
and the dissonance to that claim
and existential reality.
How can that be true?
I stare at the imminent
and protracted decay
of life.
Living among the sick,
oppressed, vulnerable and dying.
No silver linings in sight.
Tired
I has taken me a long time to put things into writing.
I am not in a good place right now.
I am overwhelmed.
I have been feeling like this for more than a year now --but more so at the start of this year.
With so many things happening I often feel like I'm hanging on a thread.
Oftentimes I'm too exhausted to pause and consider.
I just feel tired.
Too tired to even stop and think and more so to write.
Everything.
Can't articulate.
Just cry.
Alone.
I am not in a good place right now.
I am overwhelmed.
I have been feeling like this for more than a year now --but more so at the start of this year.
With so many things happening I often feel like I'm hanging on a thread.
Oftentimes I'm too exhausted to pause and consider.
I just feel tired.
Too tired to even stop and think and more so to write.
Everything.
Can't articulate.
Just cry.
Alone.
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